Lady Lorraine's Lake of Dreams

My little corner of reality expressed through my writings, the art I love.. and plain old thinking!!! I hope you will enjoy them. Blessings Lady Lorraine du Lac

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Location: Open Spaces of the, United States

I am an adventure loving woman. Spiritual! Not religious big difference! Meeting new people is a passion of mine for each has some jewel of experience to share! I am creative and curious. I write, dance and sing badly in the car. Laughter is the music of my soul! I know though tears are the cleansing agents of our heart. A seeker of knowledge and wisdom. A great listener and can talk your ear off if we have something in common. I seek the moment of perfection that lies between birth and our first breathe...the moment of pure escatsy that is the craving of all souls! A simple complex woman am I!

Tuesday, September 28, 2004


Morning rain Posted by Hello

Morning Rain

It rains today a birthday gift,
Cleansing tears open and true,
From the past I do now drift.
Open eyes, a morning view.

Wiser, older now I titter,
Such a willful one I am,
Never one to be a quitter,
Always one to give a damn!

Expression rare, a passion flares,
Life of solitude to be shared,
Standing now in the rain,
I do not doubt that I am sane.

Those who live without a care,
Past by life and will not share,
Miss so much of living true,
A hand that rises from the blue.

Express what you have come to know,
Live with zest let truth do flow,
Tell all whom you love this is true,
Hold not back moments so few.

Release the lessons of life,
Living full and not of strife,
Boring and so dead you be,
Tell the ones you love to see.

Walls do fall with each word spoke,
Show yourself to all who joke,
Love with zest so rare and pure.
Take the chance beyond and sure.
dlt © sept 28 2004


Harvest Moon Posted by Hello

Haikus 4

Emotional way,
Blizzard of expectations,
Unpredictable.

Kismet spirits dance,
Phenomenal Harvest moon,
Alone their ballroom.

Amorous autumn,
Submissive fascination,
Surrender complete.

dlt © Sept 28 2004

Monday, September 27, 2004


splendor Posted by Hello

Adieu 42!

One more day of forty-two,
Still so much left to do!
Time flies by it is so true,
Oh too soon, Forty-three debut!


Looking back now I see,
A year of learning of who to be,
Confused and alone, lost in me,
Vast a world, I began to see.


A year of tears and pain,
Saw myself oh so vain,
Joy so bright not of this plane,
One with all, I pray to attain.


The year began with tears that flowed,
Life’s lessons my private road,
Forward I went an ecclesiastical mode,
Release from past I was bestowed.


Now I have one day to go,
New hopes and dreams still to grow,
Forty two it did so show,
Just so little I really know.


Awake I am , life so grand,
One with God is the plan.
No more I cry, now I say,
Forty three, my ascension day!


dlt © Sept 27 2004

Saturday, September 25, 2004


Orange living... Posted by Hello

Not from Sin

Tides slide back from the shore,
Time flies by souls do soar.
Forever to search truth be told,
Hopes and dreams our hearts do mold.


Sitting wondering what tomorrow may be,
Wastes the moment in front to see.
Forward we move no choice at hand.
As we pull our heads from the depths of sand.


Water calls to me now to come,
Whispering softly, I know now from.
No choice but surrender all I desire.
To want and need I do retire.


Time lies before me, no life in the past.
Living there only makes the pain forever last.
Grab the moment now to begin.
Life my way comes not from sin.

dlt © Sept 25 2004

Friday, September 24, 2004


Paths of Life Posted by Hello

Two by Two

Two by two they walked the path,
Silent conversations of life they had,
Through the mists of time they waltzed,
Two by two they laughed when lost.

Others stopped and graced the path,
Lessons learned swift and fast,
Some stayed long while others ran,
Two by two no travel plan.

Winding and turning through the mists,
Sunny days sang their bliss,
Rain washed away all pain,
Two by two to God they came.

From the mist alone one walked,
Two by two within the heart,
Seen as one, who would know.
Within the two by two did grow.

Angels smiled and harps did play,
The lone one sat with nothing to say,
Through the mists alone we pray,
Two by two as one portray.

Release the need to want and have,
In the mists find your halve,
Within the self God lives and breathes,
Two by two Divine love then feeds.

dlt © Sept 24 2004

Thursday, September 23, 2004


Solitude Posted by Hello

Solitary dancing

Indian summer flows with grace that is ageless. Mists of morning float from the ground to the sky this beautiful September morning. Reflection whispers from the mists as I slowly wake to the day. I think back to my youth, a time I loved being surrounded by others, craving their presence. Even as a child I needed private time. Time to run away from others. I find that when I am surrounded by so many people my energy becomes drained. As a child I would run to the woods with a book, sit beneath a tree, reading while I soaked in solitude. Many do not understand this need, a cry from the soul for solitude. I love and need to just shut out the world for a time. Rejuvenate my soul fill it with passion and colors of living. I remember my family and lovers looking at me with disdain. Many think you selfish, while others view you as lonely! I find that loneliness is caused from not being about to sit in your own presence and love that moment. If you are not comfortable with yourself how can you be comfortable with others? Being alone is not something to fear. It is a gift. This is time to open our eyes to the small important things in life. If we always run through life we miss life!!!

So now I sit here and try to explain what it is that I feel. I have spent many years happy in my single life. Travel, read, clean, sleep and dream when I want. I work hard at the jobs I take on. Surrounded by people for hours who need my attention and assistance. As a result, I crave those hours to myself. My partners in the past never understood this need to have time to myself. To just empty myself to the universe and do what ever it is I need to do. Sleep, hike, go to the mountains or the sea, visit a bookstore or just lie in the back yard. They always needed to be part of all I do. I felt trapped, caged in many relationships, the reason for running more than once. So I laugh now in thinking that it would be nice to fall asleep next to a warm body. To feel the comfort of another soul sleeping next to you. Comprehending that someone else in this universe shares something so vulnerable and sacred, sleep and you trust them to travel in your dreams with you. What has changed in my life that I desire to share myself with another? I was always satisfied before with the aloofness that was comfortable and safe. No needing anyone, only myself to depend on and take care of. Solitude, so different than loneliness. I reflect now I am not lonesome, I enjoy my world the difference is that I would like to share it with another now. Looking at the self and always living a life that is revolving around only me does not seem right. There is more than this, I know.

This new desire really confounds me. It has been building for a year now. I have dated a few men and only a couple have come close being the person who may be the one I share myself with. Each relationship has evolved, I learn how to share to back off and to move forward. I now voice what I want or need where my aloofness always kept me silent and built a wall between that special man and myself. Funny, I am willing now to let the walls fall and crumble to the ground. Watch as they become dust and blow away in the wind. It is a freeing thought to know that I am willing. Life is funny, always a new lesson just around the corner, one to be discovered and enjoyed. I wonder what is around the corner waiting for me now? I wait for the lesson as the dust blows by me.

dlt © Sept 23 2004

Wednesday, September 22, 2004


Change Posted by Hello

Haikus 3

Quiet hours, dark dawn.
Birds calling, fly south, now gone.
Summer song echoes.

Life’s burning cycle.
Passion flares with each season.
Change is consistent.

Somaesthesia,
Lush green alters emblazon.
Adjudge life’s desires.

dlt © sept 22 2004

Monday, September 20, 2004


Autumn Passion Explosion Posted by Hello

Harvest Time

Cold night air slowly creeps,
The fall the time to sneak a peek,
Who you are and want to be,
Find the one whom you seek.

Colors so bold and bright,
Orange, red and yellow so true,
Singing dancing with all their might,
Visual life that lies in you.

Intensity and passion you scream to hold.
From deep within you look,
Colors call to you to be so bold,
Life as this, not from the book.

Reaping the rewards of your toil,
A harvest to celebrate with all you know.
Take the time yourself to spoil,
Your fall colors float and flow.

A time so tender, all to enjoy,
Moments seconds each so passion filled,
Take the time do not be coy,
Ride a leaf, sing, dance, be thrilled!

A cool autumn breeze rustles the leaves,
Stand up, look in, be the twin.
Drenched in orange, red and yellow.
To the ground the leaves will spin.

Harvest your life,
The pure moments of time,
Grab at strife,
Forward do climb.

Ride the leaf of harvest time,
Before we sleep,
Our passions entwined,
Autumn dreams yours to find.

dlt © sept 20 2004

Tuesday, September 14, 2004


Solitary Path Posted by Hello

Forever is Mine

I’ve come to believe,
The greater we need,
The more we see,
How to be.

There are those few,
Who continue to bleed.
Desires that feed,
Hopes blooming seed.

On the path they travel,
Alone to be.
Others stop and see,
Always they flee!

The wander still breathes,
Pulls themselves from the knees.
Continues the walk,
Separate from the flock.

These are the few,
Who love so true,
Sadly I see,
My path before me….

Solitude and time,
Forever is mine,
Alone I walk,
Searching for the sign.

The key in the lock,
Dreams that continue to shock,
Float to the sea.
I know now…. not to be.

dlt © sept 14 2004


Time in between Posted by Hello

The Trickster

Time is a trickster
Children with laughter
Girl of looks
Woman with regrets
Boy of dreams
Man with statue
Time is a trickster
Respect is deemed
Another year passes
A gray hair shouts
Laughing at the folly
But still I have doubts
Time is a trickster
Tomorrow it seems
Flies into today
Past now I lean
Forever a moment
Slides by with a wink
Time is a trickster
Leaving all to think
Dreams of tomorrow
In the lake do they sink.


Dlt © Sept 14 2004 all rights reserved

Friday, September 10, 2004

Lyrics today!!! Train When I look to the Sky

Well today I was too busy to write. That should never happen but life is life and that is what happens. So sitting in traffic on my way home for the office I always ask the Divine for a message in a song. On pops one of my all time favorites. When I look to the Sky! by Train. I remember the first time I heard this song. I was having a bad day which really is rare for me due to the fact that I try to see the good in all things. But that day was bad! This song came on and a soft glow came over me, I felt lighter and knew all would be well. Well today I was thinking of someone, just doing a wee bit of dreaming and here is the song again. It was so fitting I could not help but post it here. The message is strong and beautiful... enjoy!
blessings
Love and Laughter*****
Lady Lorraine du Lac


TRAIN LYRICS"When I Look To The Sky"
[Verse 1]
When it rains it pours and opens doors
And floods the floors we thought would always keep us safe and dry
And in the midst of sailing ships we sink our lips into the ones we love
That have to say goodbye
[Chorus:]
And as I float along this oceanI can feel you like a notion that won't seem to let me go
Cause when I look to the sky something tells me you're here with me
And you make everything alright
And when I feel like I'm lost something tells me you're here with me
And I can always find my way when you are here
[Verse 2]
And every word I didn't say that caught up in some busy day
And every dance on the kitchen floor we didn't have before
And every sunset that we'll miss I'll wrap them all up in a kiss
And pick you up in all of this when I sail away
[Chorus:]
And as I float along this ocean
I can feel you like a notion that I hope will never leave
[Verse 3]
Whether I am up or down or in or out or just plane overhead
Instead it just feels like it is impossible to fly
But with you I can spread my wings to see me over everything that life may send me
When I am hoping it won't pass me by
And when I feel like there is no one that will ever know methere you are to show me
Cause when I look to the sky something tells me you're here with me
And you make everything alright
And when I feel like I'm lost something tells me you're here with me
And I can always find my way when you are here [X2]
[Thanks to Foxygrandma2790@aol.com, LilSwan72@aol.com for correcting these lyrics]

Thursday, September 09, 2004


Dream Walking Imogen Cunningham 1968 Posted by Hello

The Garden

I went to the garden today,
No muse to come and play.
So alone did I sit,
To the garden I submit,
Alone not to be,
Closed my eyes in order to see.
My muse from far he did come,
Visions of him my mind he is from,
We ran and we hid,
No desires forbid,
Climbing trees,
Staring at bees,
Lost we become,
To needs we succumb.
In the garden we play,
Both have our say.
The birds and the bees,
Laugh as we tease.
Joy and bliss,
In the garden we kiss.
I only need to close my eyes,
Before me my muse lies.
This moment forever the prize!
I went to the garden today…..

dlt © sept. 9 2004 all rights reserved

Tuesday, September 07, 2004


On Mt. Rainer 1 Imogen Cunningham Posted by Hello

Song for the Muse

The men of my life,
Leave me confused.
No desire for strife,
Smiling due to my muse.

Others come and go,
Doors now closed,
Do they not know?
Retreat, no deal to propose.

Muse my friend,
Understand where I am.
Nothing lies dormant,
You have opened the dam.

A lover, a friend.
You hold all I am,
Freedom of laughter,
Innocence of the lamb.

I trust you more,
Than all before.
Push through all fear,
In my heart you are dear.

Let me in,
There is no sin.
Reasons that hide,
The truth we abide.

Only you I asked,
No running, don’t quit!
All others are shadows,
In your glory I sit.
Dlt © sept. 7 2004 all rights reserved

Monday, September 06, 2004


Imogen S-P 1915  Posted by Hello

Time at Hand

Close thy eyes,
Time at hand.
Precious and foolish,
Maybe I am!

Hope does reign,
Sword pulled from sand,
Slashing the pain,
Purging the land.

Echoes flounder,
Bounce from wall to wall.
Chaotic mind with a heart sounder,
Deep breath taken, I begin to fall.

Over the edge,
Raw and young,
Time endless,
No words caress the tongue.

Speechless desire,
Needs to be met.
The heroine begins to tire,
Her foot on the path is set.

Ancient and Youthful.
Love is the grail.
Compassion and kindness,
All else does pale.

Journey alone,
Finding the truth,
Ready to share,
With one who eludes.

Herself she finds,
In others and all things,
One with all time,
Rich life this does bring.

Outsider in,
Insider out.
Now is the time,
No longer she doubts.
Dlt © Sept 6 2004 all rights reserved

Saturday, September 04, 2004


Martha Graham by Imogen Cunningham Posted by Hello

The Calling

I wait for your calling
To come live in the bliss
Painful the longing
The need for your kiss


Long I have searched
For one who dares
Accept the challenge
Live the passion that flares


Look to the east
I sing to the west
North is barren
South calls to the flesh


Submit to thee
Take all that I am
Gentle and loving
Open the dam


Simple inside
Complex the outer
No longer I hide
Push through the doubter


False life unveiled
True to oneself
Arms open freely
Bliss in the self


Within you I see
A mirror of me
Truth of the moment
Free now I will be


I wait for your calling
To come live in the bliss
Painful the longing
The need for your kiss


dlt © sept 4 2004


center of all things Posted by Hello

The Center of All Things

Stuck in a moment
No where to be
Time floats slowly
Messages to thee


Moving forward
Fast but slow
The ache of desire
Continues to flow


Lost in the mist
Where to go
Frighten and fearless
Only time will show


Head held high
Persistence reigns
Patience and kindness
Pushing through old pains


Listen in the wind
Feel me near
Close but distant
Passion so clear


You whisper and beckon
Come love with the kings
Live in that second
The center of all things


dlt © sept. 4 2004

Wednesday, September 01, 2004


Solitude Posted by Hello

Haikus 2

VIII
Lone morning dove cries
Salutations to the day
Joyful solitude.

IX
Green sky at my feet
Lush dew dances anew
Calm mind, thoughts are few.

dlt sept. 1 2004 copyright all rights reserved

Adventures in Dating

Well we all remember that classic movie Adventures in Baby-sitting, it seems that Adventures in Dating is not that far off the scope. Each new man a new adventure in the delving of self, I can only think to myself what a great time! NOT! Many times now, I think back to my solitude era with fond memories. Times of self indulgence, emotional unavailability, education, mountain climbing, museums, friends, cafés and no one to pound my heart into dust but myself! When it came to the time to move on, I looked upon dating with enthusiasm and glee. I have always been a woman that had a boyfriend or no one. To date was exciting. No more false front, really knowing who and what I am, I put myself out there to see what will come. And come they did!

I did not understand that dating was going to be an educational experience. I thought it would be fun, exciting and just flirtations. Rather, I have found that in each man I find a piece of myself. I am forced to go to depths and heal areas that I much rather have left buried. Growing pains! I thought I left those behind in my teens, guess not! Life is a series of growing pains, part of the journey, the plan, the way. I have loved each of these men unconditionally, or so I believed. This was the strongest lesson I learned. To be able to allow them to be themselves and go when they had to. Now did I like this? No! But we do not own anyone nor, do they own us. They are placed in our lives to help the universe grow. You see it has more to do with than you and me. It is about healing all that there is. Each man has healed my feminine energy and I have helped them heal. The lessons vary, it maybe an issue of trust, compassion, patience, unconditional love or plan old releasing the ego. This is the mission to heal the male and female energies damaged for thousands of years and now accelerating at unbelievable speeds.
My first man in this last realm of dating was 16 years my senior. He was nothing like my former male companions. No money, short, slightly overweight and with a zeal for the painful. A heart of gold, he did everything he could to heal me from my anger issues. I believe that many times we attract those in our lives to heal the wounds we just don’t want to face. JB taught me so many beautiful lessons. We started off as friends the best foundation for a relationship and because of this we are great friends to this day. We spent hours talking about dealing with life on life terms. We spoke on the existence of God who at that time I doubted! We laughed, we cried, spent hours just being happy in the simple daily chores of life. I thank him for teaching me to live in the moment. Do not take anything for granted. To deal with the anger that raged inside of me. I thank him for setting me free and letting me fall on my knees and surrender to myself. Finally, he taught me that he is there for me, sadly only on his terms, but still he is there. This small amount of support was more than I ever experienced before in my life. He taught me that I am a strong, brilliant, woman that is beautiful inside and out. He saw my beauty and strength when I did not and in our break up he taught me I did not need him to know this. Lastly, my lesson with JB was that I could not save anyone but myself. Each individual has free will and we can not force one to love us or even listen to our suggestions, if they are not willing. All happens for a reason and I am grateful that he still makes me laugh and infuriates me. Any other way would not be JB and I appreciate the man he is.
Long distance relationships via the Internet, not one I highly suggest! K.. swooped me off my feet. He gave me the romance I needed, made me stretch my mind, my heart and open my soul. This man taught me to love unconditionally and to forgive. Living in Canada, we were not just miles apart, but also, countries apart. He resurrected the adventurous Denise; awakened was the seeker, the risk taker, the writer, the woman. I jumped on a plane and flew to Canada after hours of phone calls and endless hours of love talk. He gave me excitement, made me face my issues of motherhood and lack of self worth. He encouraged me to learn, to open myself to my weaknesses and strengths, educating me to believe in love and to embrace it. Through K.. I experienced the cleansing of tears, loss, rejection, abandonment and deception. All lessons I did not care to relive, but his betrayal forced me to deal with my father issues, learn that it was not about me, rather them. What was about me was how I would deal with the situation, struggle through, feel all of it and still know I can be loved regardless of what they did to me. This is when I came to understand the power of God living within me. Two months of endless crying, the need to know why and deep immersion with God left me a stronger woman. A divine female with a voice, a heart and knows that in pain and sorrow there is bliss and joy. I will forever be grateful for the doors opened by this man. In dealing with this relationship, I found that I had a voice and a choice. I could say enough was enough when he left and returned. I could express forgiveness in the face of his hate filled words. I also could heal when the deception was revealed. Learning that sometimes the why is better not known! He introduced me to some of the most amazing women in my life. These women support and love me regardless of the mood or situation I am in at the time. My brain functions again, the craving for knowledge once again flows through my being. The pain was unbearable, but I smile fondly in the memories of the life coming back to me with his romance and praise. I know now it was not him, it always lived within me, I just needed a mirror to see.

Out of the blue came this simple man. One again not of my usual type. Soft spoken, a lover of nature and music. A thinker, but one who delves only so deep. A man who knows how to shut down his mind when needed and take a mental vacation! Pure moments, of contentment were the lessons here. Patience and understanding to let one be with their own lessons. Allowing to let go and just be. My need to heal his wounded soul no longer became a desire. I felt his pain but, knew that I can not heal one who is unwilling to open up. This simple man taught me to receive, to allow another to do for me. Independent in nature, I forever am unwilling to allow another to help me. Forever the giver, I did not want the cost of receiving. I believed that in allowing another to do for me I owed them and someday they will call in the marker. Where K had shattered my allowance to trust, T now taught me to open up and I would not be judged. He saw the loving woman I am, and taught me not to settle for less than I deserve. Our friendship has grown. I know that is all we can have. He can not live in my world for long, but he sure gave it a good try. His gentle nature and his joy in doing things for me exhibited to me what I feel when I do for others. In order to grow we have to allow the other to give also and be vulnerable to receive. I will never forget our camping trip when he did everything for me. So against my nature, I was so uncomfortable and just wanted to cry. It hurt to allow him to pamper me and just be happy for his joy in giving. I slowly became accustomed to this new feeling. I take joy in remembering the simple moments of sharing around a camp fire, while the stars danced over our heads to our musical laughter. T has been there never leaving, while I dealt with painful issues. He loves me to the best of his ability, which I now see is not enough for me. I value his friendship and the purity of trust and acceptance.

At the moment I realized that I had to let T be, I also gave up. I no longer looked for love or a man in my life. I found bliss in my writing. My life was a mess, but I love chaos! For this short period my self-esteem hit a low. I did not know where I fit in. The life of an outsider goes through these periods in which although your faith is strong, you find you have lost your goal and understanding of why you are here. I also learned at this time, that I am emotionally unavailable to the men in my life. I allow them in only so far, then I put up a wall. Each of these men have journeyed farther in the Lake of Lorraine, some even allowed to swim in the warm currents. At some point though, I put up a dam and do not allow them to go over the falls at the base of the waters edge. I believed that if they knew the real Denise Lorraine they could not love me. Unique, different, original, there is a comfort in being the fantasy. Though I protested and protested that I was a woman, not a dream, I did not allow them to discover this on their own. I sabotage every relationship when I feel vulnerable or threatened. So I had made the decision to just be myself and not date, nor allow anyone in. Then came J. With a simple hi, he just breezed through the locked doors and taught me to feel. I have never been made love to, always made love to men, no allowance of emotional drenching in another soul. That was dangerous. It meant that you had to be totally open, vulnerable, submissive and enjoy being yourself. I allowed J to come to the Lake of Lorraine, swim in the currents, and teach me to receive my own beauty. What a gift, bittersweet in its revelation, that I had denied myself this glory for so long. I realized during this grace that J bestowed on me, that I had been here before. The poetry, the phone calls, the romance, the desire to know me, the inner me to know what makes me tick all that J was doing was bringing to surface a final healing. An issue that I just did not want to surface. I was told that I don’t have relationships, the truth hurts sometimes.

Today I had to deal with the past and a man named Jack. I buried this relationship, never acknowledging it or mourning it. A captain for a large airline, I met Jack in my senior year of college. I had a few dates, but always with younger men, who were enchanted with me and I would not have to have any form of emotional commitment to. Jack was different. He rearranged his flights in order to visit Massachusetts, just spend a couple of hours at my bar and get to know me. I told him firmly he had no chance with me. I was not dating, nor was I looking to date. This did not deter this man. He said he would wait, for I was worth the wait. I think back now at the small things he did for me. The notes, the flowers, the interest in what I was learning, a book I loved, coffee at just the right time, a smile during a stressful peroid, hours of talk and plain old just being there not giving up. Eight months he did this, flying up regularly twice a week to sit and talk to me, learn about the woman, not just the beauty behind the bar. Slowly, I let him in and finally we began to date. I now close my eyes and remember how he taught me to dream again. Walking through used book stores, strolling and sharing our selections, exclaiming excitement in a rare find or a secret smile as we glanced at the others direction. Silent moments in bed while reading, the comfort and contentment of just being in the presence of the other, no words needed….. just being. I was happy and to the best of my ability at that time, I fell in love. I let Jack make love to me, but still the wall was there, no trust in men, I gave him what I could. He knew I was holding back, but still he pampered me with luxury hotels in Boston, chocolate truffles, listening to my rantings, a touch on the back, long passionate kisses and dreams of what we would do in our future. It was the closest I have ever been to a man and I chose to let it go. I took a new powerful job, while he also started a new position in Miami. He sent me cards, phone calls and emails. I flooded him with my tormented writings! All the while the Dave Matthews song Crash kept pounding in my head. I just knew that if given the chance he was going to break my heart. I made a decision then, to immerse myself in my new career and forget him. Slowly, the communication stopped, I lost myself in the business world growing more unhappy each and every day. Then I lost that job and out of the blue he contacts me. I think, should I answer? Is it too late? Can I try? His email says he is flying again and needs to see me. I wait a week before answering, there are voice mails left by him, but still I wait. Finally, pulling everything I have in the department of courage, I email him yes. What happened next knocked my socks off. I received an email back from his wife. He had returned to her and she was telling me that I needed to stay away. She knew of me and asked me to please leave them be, give her another chance. I was right! I felt like a fool for dreaming that we could start again.

This short romance with J opened this all over again, making me face it and deal with it. Did I handle J correctly? NO! I again sabotaged the glory that is the gift that God gave me. I did not appreciate the beauty of what he made me feel nor, did I thank God for this man. Ungrateful, I drove him away. Feeling fearful and vulnerable, I did not trust that no matter what, God always takes care of me. I looked to the future, lived in the past and ignored the present. I did not live what I preach! This has been a strong lesson and maybe a What if ….that will haunt me to my dying day. Free will is a strong ally, not to be taken lightly. At this moment I thank God for this man, who I allowed to swim in my lake, deeper than any other man in my life. I am grateful for the healing of Jack and my love for him, allowing the acknowledgment of my choice and remembering that I made the choice. I now see what I do with relationships and am willing to be emotionally available. I am blessed and graced. For although each man has been a vehicle for learning, the lessons have always been there inside of me! As the antics in that timeless movie Adventures in Baby-Sitting revealed, Thor was only an illusion, the truth lies within. My Adventures in Dating have provided me with beautiful Thors, that I am so grateful for! I also have learned that these are men, living, breathing, loving humans. They are just as important as I am. The lessons I have learned were gifts from them, they are not illusions, rather equal partners in the journey. I am at peace again, having shed tears for the past and my foolishness of the present. Dating, a journey worth taking, one of courage, love and compassion.
Dlt copyright Aug. 31 2004 all rights reserved